One of the things, which came to mind today, was my inability to change things. I mean here we are and it’s a beautiful day. Not so this past winter. Lots of complaints from friends of mine. Yet there was nothing any of us could do to change the weather.
That’s something I remember which would cause me problems. Unhappiness. Sometimes misery. Feeling sorry for oneself. Even anger and sometimes deep resentments. Tough to be that way. And it always reminded me of what my sponsor would always tell me. Don’t ever depend on my emotions.
In fact I remember that one old timer, Henry the Plumber. He would always bring up the topic, “Change our attitudes.” He pointed out that our attitudes could change what was going on for us. He said that they couldn’t change the facts, the day that is. But they could change our conseptions. I could wake up one day, which was beautiful, and I would feel great. I could wake up the next day, the same beauty, but I would feel depressed and angry. What had changed? My attitude…governed by my negative emotions.
That’s where my sponsor stepped in and told me that, when the negative is there, to stop my day and start it over. I learned to step back and take a deep breath. Step aside and, if possible, find a quiet place, say a prayer, meditate for a moment, turn our attitude from negative to positive, and go on with my day. Does work…if I want to change for the better.
And, of course, that’s where the Serenity Prayer comes to the front for me. And my Higher Power. And, then, my fellow alcoholics in here. Sober of course. Most things I cannot change. But I can change me. Again I learned that from my sponsor and this program.
Once again the spiritual life is not a theory. I found I have to live it.
Just thinking again of why I am here. I am here to stay sober a day at a time. I have to learn to stay focused. When I do, I am generally at peace and happiness. What I have been given in here is so much I have to be grateful. But I know I can forget. I am human and subject to my faults. However I know I have to remind myself that I have to have the courage to change the things I can. And the wisdom to know the difference. That’s me. But how often and much I need the aid of my Higher Power and others.
Worthwhile to stop and think about these things.