One of the things which gives me an itch is the fact that we get used to this life in sobriety. It’s not that we’re not supposed to be comfortable, but getting used to it is something else. Whenever I tend to get used to something it can become boring. The “is this all there is” syndrome. It can become the end of the process we talk about. The end of progress.
My sponsor used to warn me about this. I guess he did that because he got tired of hearing me moan and whine, “is this all there is?”. Tom told me that when I whined like that, it was because I was not doing anything. He kept pointing out to me that this was a program of action. The line in the BB, where it says that when we rest on our laurels in this program of spiritual action, we’re soon headed for trouble. Oh, the action he was talking about is spiritual. You can see what a dunderhead he had to work with.
The action he urged me to take were the steps. But I had already done the steps. What else was there to do? Work the steps he’d come back to me. The answer is in the steps. I guess my problem was that I was sitting on the steps instead of putting them into action. The truth was that I was (am) lazy. Who would have guessed that?
The book tells us that we have but a daily repreive from alcoholism. It’s just for today today. I guess that means what I did yesterday is gone and I have to start over. Everyday is a day I have to find a way to apply the principles of these steps to my life…today.
I heard someone say one time that after a period of time in applying these steps to his life, he found that they had become one thing. He didn’t see, when a problem came up, that it was this step or that step he needed, but he saw them as the total package he could apply at any given time. Even though I can parse them out, when I have to, I find the same thing. The steps just are and they are what keep me on track, unless I sit on them.
I don’t ever want to get used to sobriety. I am comfortable in sobriety, but I should never be satisfied. Satisfaction says to me “I’m done”. I will never be done. I will always be doing. If I want to stay sober. And I do.
I get a lot of help in this from others, who keep reminding me of what it is I need to do this day. That’s why I need to go to meetings, where I can hear the answer to my quandries. I’m reminded of what I often forget. But, like the BB says, there is one who has all power, may you find Him now. That’s a good reminder.
Thinking on a Feb.morning.
Need Mail bonding?