If I can ever do anything, let me know. These words were said by me to a man I sponsor, who had just called me. He was telling me of the dilemma a nephew of his was in that day. Just before that we both agreed that we couldn’t take the third step for another person. And here I was saying If I could ever do anything, let me know. The question I had to ask myself, was, what could I do? And the answer came back, nothing. I’m powerless.
I often think to myself, why do I write these messages? The answer came back, to give someone out there hope. That’s at least something. Doesn’t always take. I’ve seen the results of this. I’ve been with men, who had called for me to come over and talk to them, because they were thinking of taking a drink. We would talk, sometimes all night, and at the end of it, they took a drink. I’ve talked to people who were thinking of taking their lives, and they did. They were hopeless and helpless. I couldn’t do it for them. I was powerless.
That recognition of our powerlessness is the foundation of what the first three steps are about. That our very lack of power opens the door to the solution. The solution is to be found in a faith in a power greater than ourselves, who can restore what we had lost in our egotism and selfish self centeredness. It restored us to life and empowers us to live a life where we are free of the encumbrances of the past and directs our feet onto a path which tells us we’re in a place where we have a faith and program, which works. But, though we’re empowered to live this richly fulfilling life, we’re not empowered to change others. It’s the old story of we can lead a horse to water, but we can’t make it drink.
I stll remember the day that woman, who was helpless and couldn’t stop drinking, came to a meeting place and asked me to read the Third Step Prayer with her. I was embarassed, because another man was sitting on the other side of the room. We sat down and read the prayer together. My mind was on the other man, hers was on the prayer she was saying. She never drank again, after that moment. She had done it. I had done nothing in my distraction. But she had demonstrated something; our need of support from others, even if they’re distracted. She demonstrated the principle that we can’t do it alone. But she also demonstrated that if we want it bad enough, we can have what the rest of us found; sobriety.
What can I do? I can do what we all do. We offer the program and the hope that someone else wants it. That we can do. And in doing it, we can add the insurance that we’ll have another day sober.