When is it, in sobriety, that I can get too much of anything? I think it’s when it’s all about me. Too much of self. When I find myself in my own way. When I am like that, as I often find myself to be, I am far away from my center and my higher power.
There is a way to recover from that state of mind. It is to work with others and get out of my own way by focusing on the needs of another. But that takes an honest appraisal of where I am and that means to take an inventory of where I am today. And often it takes someone outside of myself to point out to me that I need to do this. Thanks to others in this program and the grace of my higher power this kind of help has been provided to me over the years.
I was thinking about this today. Too much of anything is too much. Balance is needed I have found and that comes only through the steps and talking and listening to others. An open mind, which has a tendency to close so quickly when I’m not paying attention.
Often this comes, when I have unconsciously slipped into a rut. When complacency slips in unnoticed. After so much time, I have found that others are reluctant to step up and tell me I have a problem. That can be a problem. I have often wished that others would step past my defenses and not pay attention to an unearned reputation. I need to hear the voices, which will tell me that I am resting on my laurels.
Sobriety today is still my first priority. But listening to the voices of others is important to me if I am to maintain that sobriety. I have seen others stumble along the way, when they appeared to be above it all. I pray that the second part of that primary purpose will open the door to allow the freedom to escape from too much of me; to help another alcoholic to achieve sobriety.
Anyway, I was thinking about this today.