No, not the “ex’s” we ordinarily think about when someone refers to our mishaps in relationships, but the other two: experience and example. I was thinking about that this morning.
First off, what kind of example am I to others? I often wonder about that. Not something I put on only when I’m at meetings, but what I wear naturally, as a result of my being sober. Does my sobriety wear well before others. I know that I’m going to be guilty of slipping up in things I say and do. I probably always will. After all I’m just another human being full of faults. What I think about is does what I try to practice on a daily basis show through to others? This is a program of attraction. I wonder if I would be attracted to someone like me?
I’m not talking about going around and looking at myself all the time. What I am talking about is what I see in others. The one’s whose sobriety shows through. In them is my mirror. Am I anything like what I see in others whom I admire?
I guess it goes down to the core of who I am today. What I have gleaned from living a sober life. Am I at ease with myself? That must be what I’m looking for. My sponsor told me that when I achieved a certain comfort -ability with myself that I would no longer want to drink. If I am comfortable with me I know that I am at ease with me and with others. That’s what I see in those, who are sober and I am drawn to myself.
All this is based on my experiences throughout my time in sobriety. My experiences are there for me to use and draw on when I’m trying to express what it is like to grow along spiritual lines through the practice of the steps.
Though they may have been uncomfortable at times, when I was in the process of attempting to put them into practice, these experiences are what brought about the comfort I have with myself today. Bill W. tells us that the pain we experience at times in our lives is the touchstone of spiritual growth. All growth is the result of our struggle with things we tend to resist. I’ve always resisted change. It has never been easy, but the results are fantastic for me.
Today our group celebrates anniversaries of those who got sober in this month. I was thinking about those who are marking this day and the examples many of them have been for me. I know that, when they are called on to speak, I will hear them talk about their experiences and their gratitude at having achieved this milestone. And I know that I will be able to share in their gratitude and pray that I may be able to express that in what I do and say today.