I was laughing earlier this evening, when I thought about what an old timer once said. He said that if he ran into a good habit, he could practice it everyday for years and still not get it. But, he said, if he ran into a bad habit for the first time, he would only have to do it once and it would be a chronic habit for him.
I may have laughed, when I could see him and hear him, as he was, but the truth is that it really isn’t all that funny or laughable. My habits can get me into all kinds of trouble. First of all, like the BB said, when talking about anger and resentments, they can cut us off from the sunlight of the spirit. That can be dangerous. Particularly if they persist.
Take resentments for instance. It may not seem like a “habit”, but with me they can be. I can resist them for a time, but, when they are not around in my life, bang!, they’re back in an instant. And they multiply like rabbits. Even my friends can become the subject of these.
I was thinking about writing on prayer, but the thought of habits came on, when I was sitting and thinking about sobriety. Sober habits. That thought led me back to that old timer.
And, by the way, prayer is very much a part of dealing with habits. I’m talking about the worst ones. Ones, which cut us off from the sunlight of the spirit. It was, when the BB was talking about this, it was talking about the hazard of picking up a drink again.
These habits are revealed to me in my inventories and in my conversations with my sponsor and old friends in sobriety. Anyway, one good habit, which doesn’t come easy, as that old man said, is doing what I’m doing at the moment. That’s because it reveals me to me. Not something I like going into at times.
But here I am again. Still trying to practice a form of meditation, which will keep me open. Open minded, I hope. Open to listening to others. Open to the truth. Open to continued sobriety. Open to life in the spirit. Open to good habits and open to closing the door on bad habits, which can threaten my sobriety.
Anyway just thinking. Thinking can be a good habit or a bad habit. Depending on what I’m thinking about. For example, one of my bad habits of thinking used to paralyze me. Analyzing, when I should leave that old habit alone. The result of ego. Thinking I’m some kind of intellectual. It never led anywhere, except to put my life and sobriety on hold, at times.
I’m really thinking about what’s been presented to me as a way of life to practice, practice, practice. What doesn’t come natural and takes willingness and commitment from me. The program. The Steps. The spiritual way of life, which I have to surrender to on a daily basis. It takes effort and action on my part. Doesn’t matter how I feel. Matters only that I do it. The good “habits”, which I need to muster the energy to do. Like my old friend said, I can practice it forever and it’s still new to me. But I do it, because I want to stay sober.