One of the most important things I can do is to talk and share. And then be open to others sharing with me. But one really can’t do without the other, I found out over time.
The reason I stop and think about this is that I discovered how important this was for me to continue to stay sober. I can get help and then I can help others to do the same. And this all began with my old sponsor, who helped me to begin to become honest and open. Not easy at the beginning, but with help I began to learn just how to do this.
What this did for me was to help me learn about my thoughts and my emotional life and it’s power over me. It got me, over time, to begin to recognize my lying and to start telling the truth to my sponsor and others in this program. Clumsy at first. But like it was pointed out to me, over and over again, I needed to focus on staying sober a day at a time. I only had to do anything right now.
But I had to learn to trust and to be trusted. Again that’s where my old sponsor helped me. I learned to not only trust him and others like him, but to develop the courage I needed to trust myself and present that to others like me. Again not an overnight event. But, like I was thinking, how important sponsors with time in here are to drunks like myself.
I am so grateful to my sponsor and those old timers, and my Higher Power, who gave me trust and care within, so that I could learn to cooperate. Each and everyday I stay in here, sober, I pray and ask for the help I need to continue to grow in my sober life. And that includes living to be open in this program. And yet, I learned from my old sponsor that I needed judgment to be able to know whom I can be open with and whom I need to be polite and continue to walk away. Had a few negative responses to help me to learn how to distinguish be open and closed.
Anyway I was thinking about this today and needed to stop and put this down. And, yes, I do recognize why I am here. I am here today to stay sober this day. And, like I was thinking, I am very grateful for all I have been given. Gifts from my Higher Power, the program itself, my old sponsor and those old timers, and so many I have met and have been given care and compassion.