Today I was thinking about a lot of things. Maybe it’s because I am supposed to speak at an anniversary meeting in a week. That very fact has brought a lot of things to mind. One of them is why I came here in the first place.
At my very first meeting, an old timer read a passage from the Jan. 6 page of the Twenty-Four Hours a Day book. In essence it talked about my decision to stop drinking. It said that it was the most important decision I had ever made. Can I ever afford to forget this, even for one minute? The answer of course is No. No I can’t. I was to carry that thought around with me for a long time. I still do.
But I also realize that it’s not enough for me to carry that thought or any other thought I’ve learned in this program around with me. What I have learned in here, which has given me my sobriety, I have to give it away to others, or I might lose it. And that’s what I was thinking about, when I was offered the opportunity to speak to other alcoholics.
AA as I have learned in this program is not a static way of life. To me it’s an active program. Dynamic. It’s up to me, as a way of practicing all I have been given, to act in gratitude by giving away what has been so freely given to me. It was shown to me by my sponsor and those old timers, that there is no way I can save my sobriety by storing it up within. To do that would make what I have stale and wasted.
Tradition 5 tells me that the purpose of the AA group is to carry the message to the alcoholic, who still suffers. I’ve learned over time that could be anyone in a meeting. The newcomer and sometimes the old timer. That’s my purpose for speaking at the event which has been scheduled. I’m not there to just tell my story to fulfill some need of my ego. I’m there to bring a message of hope. That there is a solution. This program works and I and others like myself are evidence that it does.
That’s one of the many reasons I go to meetings regularly. I try to remember that I’m going in gratitude. I may not get the opportunity to always share, but I can, with, like I said, others like myself, be evidence of how it works. Sometimes, like the poet John Milton said, they also serve, who only stand and wait. And service is what it’s all about.