Once again humility was one of the two subjects today. A day at a time was the other. However getting our egos back into healthy shape was the one, which took up most of the talks.
Most of us could express how it was for us, when we first came into this program. How out of size our egos were. I know that ego deflation in depth was one of the efforts those old timers applied to alcoholics like myself and how much I truly needed that. And I am so grateful those old timers were willing to open up and hit someone like me and cut me down to size.
Of course being able to be honest with oneself is what we all need. However the human side of us is what gets in our way. As the BB points out we’re not saints. So application of the spiritual to our egos is alright, if we can continue to apply it. But it states that we will be subject to tripping ourselves up over time. And that reintroduces our defects into our life.
However I know we need to continue to try to apply humility into our lives. Like my old sponsor told me, when I trip over myself and my old defects, I’m to pick myself up and dust myself off and keep on keeping on.
Anyway I needed to stop and remind myself of why I am here. To stay sober a day at a time. To continue to attempt to apply this spiritual way of life into mine. To do whatever it is I need to do to try to remain faithful to why I am here. Of course one of those ways is also an expression of gratitude for all I have been given. That’s the Twelfth Step, so freely given to us to freely give to others like ourselves.
All this reminds me to continue to express faith and hope in here. And, of course, love for those who are seeking to stay sober. And that’s everyone in here. Thanks.