Today was one of those days, when more than one person was talking about how much “they knew”. Absolutely nothing. And a lot of those in here quoted my old sponsor for them. That they didn’t know that they didn’t know. They only thought they did. In fact a couple of them were coming back from drinking again.
I know when my old sponsor told me that, it woke me up. He said it in a way that was very clear for this alcoholic. It told me that I had to learn how to change and begin to listen to those who knew how to get sober and stay sober. What I so desperately needed.
And every time I think about this, it helps me focus on why I am here. It reminds me that I needed to not only learn, but to begin, right after the First Step, by going into the Second and learning to live a spiritual way of life, and to start to relate to my Higher Power. And then to not only go into the rest of the Steps, but to begin to learn how to stop being run by the negative emotions, which ran my alcoholic mind out there, and was starting to do the same in here.
I could hear these negative emotions running these people, and it was probably going to trip them up again, if they failed to begin to listen to old timer sponsors in here. Not an easy journey, but do-able, if we want to get sober and stay sober.
I know that all of this reminded the sober alcoholics, who had quoted my old sponsor, of stepping into compassion for these people, who were over talking and trying to convince us that they knew what we all do to get sober and stay sober. I know that I had that concept of compassion, when I spoke, but, just in case, I closed my sharing with humor. It also is part of the Serenity Prayer, about not being able to be in charge.
Anyway I can hope that maybe some may come back and ask for help. I know that we may be able to freely give what was freely given to us. I was aware that was what a lot of these long time members in here were trying to do. I hoped that maybe one or two might be listening and be willing to come back.