How many times have I been caught up, having to make a decision or take an action, when I had no ground to stand on. How many times I’ve rushed in and done something and later regretted the consequences of my actions. How often I have spoken, without the slightest consideration, and hurt others with my words.
My sponsor came up with a formula to help me in most of these situations. And help it did. He told me, “When in doubt, don’t”. What brilliance. I’ve used this, hopefully to my advantage, so many times it’s not funny. For one thing it got me to a point, where I would stop and think. It made me stop, when I was not sure, and pause. It pulled me back from the brink of precipitous action. It also, gave me something I could pass on to those, who have followed, and perhaps save them from that next drink.
Yesterday, I was talking to an old friend of mine, and she did something, which has been done to me before. She took me back into the BB and talked about this phrase; when in doubt, don’t. What she did was point out to me its source. It was Bill W. himself. It’s not that my sponsor took any credit for this statement. He didn’t. In fact, he used to say over and over, that all that he knew, he learned from others. Me too. He just condensed it, so that I would have something simple to work with. I often need simple. But, when she pointed out the passage, I found that I also need a whole lot more.
Here’s what Bill said in Bill’s Story. ” I was to test my thinking by the new God consciousness within. Common sense would thus become uncommon sense. I was to sit quietly when in doubt, asking only for direction and strength to meet my problems as He would have me. Never was I to pray for myself, except as my requests bore on my usefullness to others. Then only might I expect to receive. But that would be in great measure.”
My response was a great big WOW! I can’t tell you how often I have missed something like this, even though I have been through this book innumerable times. Old timers and my sponsor told me over and over that the solution to all my problems would be found in the BB. Here is a case in point. That’s what I used to drink over and over again; my problems. Like the Dr. in the Doctor’s Opinion said: “…having lost their self-confidence, their reliance on things human, their problems pile up on them and become astonishingly difficult to solve.” That described me to a T.
Now, I knew what Fred was talking about in More About Alcoholism, when he said: “Quite as important was the discovery that spiritual principles would solve all my problems.” Sandy B. said the same thing in his talk The Spirtual Life is not a Theory.
Panic, anxiety, fear, anger, self pity would tell me no. It’s not possible. Why not give up? There’s no way out.
Is that an invitation to a drink or what? At this point I forget that the second step told me what the solution was. A Higher Power. But Bill invites me to “test my thinking by the new God consciousness within”. He talks about the doubt we all suffer from. Especially when we’re suffering from fear, anxiety, self pity, and most of all pride.
Too proud to ask for help from others or the hand of help from above.
We’re all going to fail. We are prone to falling down. It’s an imperfect life at best. That’s why I have to be reminded by others what to do. Others help pick me up and dust me off and tell me to keep on going. We all have our turn at helping others to their feet again and helping them get back on track. That’s what the “WE” is about. I just have to remember that when in doubt don’t. And then turn to the BB and find the answer.