Remember the saying, think before you speak? Wish I could always remember that. When I was drinking, my mouth always got me into trouble. Lots. Sober, it’s been better, but the penchant to open my mouth and insert foot, leg, thigh, the whole body, is still there.
Nothing pays off more handsomely than restraint of tongue and pen. I know that’s true and my experience bears that out. For the most part I have been able to practice this. Yet there have been times when I have responded too quickly to what I conceive as provocation. And just as many times I have put my mouth in where it doesn’t belong. This has led to some pretty bad consequences. If not outright arguments, at least hurt feelings by the other party. And personally a lot of guilt or resentments.
I was thinking about this today, because I have been exposed to some pretty provocative statements by a person this weekend. I’ve ignored the bait and gone about my business. This morning a statement was made to me and I put a guard on my tongue, yet I heard in my head the immediate response I would have made. I was glad I avoided putting those words out there. But just the thought which occurred to me was a warning.
A good friend of mine of many years once said that she was glad she was my friend. She said she would hate to be my enemy. She was talking about my mouth. Her words were a wake up call to me. They were a warning and came from one who cared enough in an attempt to help me. I’ve always appreciated her advice.
What’s this got to do with staying sober? Just this: if I revert back to the habits I had when I was drinking, sooner or later they will pile up and lead back to a drink. I need to ask my higher power for help and listen to the good counsel of others. If I listen to myself? It ends up with rationalization and justification.
Awareness is the key for me. It’s the basis of a spiritual way of life and sobriety. I was thinking about this today.