I was sitting here reading the BB, when a friend of mine, who is studying for his graduate degree, got in touch with me with some questions. He wanted to ask me, because I was old enough to know some song titles from way back when. It really made me laugh.
The first question had to do with a song title, which would signify the start of some business venture. My choice was “This Is The Start of Something Big”. The second question had to do with a song, which would signify the ending of a business venture. My choice? “The Party’s Over” from the Bells Are Ringing.
After the call, I returned to reading the BB. Then it struck me, and I had to laugh again, how both those songs kind of related to my alcoholism. When I began drinking This Is The Start Of Something Big, certainly described that. And when my drinking ended, The Party’s Over says it all.
In the beginning my drinking was the biggest deal in my life. It became an all consuming way of “living”. All of my goals and aspirations were wiped out. It eventually erased most of my relationships, even with my wife and children. It certainly began to erase even my working life. And finally, as my life began to crumble around me, living in a world of ruinous dreams, a nightmare, it ended in despair. The party was certainly over.
But, lo and behold, that first song came back. I got hope, with the presentation of AA and a way out of that nightmare and into the reality of living a sober life. This was indeed the beginning of something big. Bigger and better than anything I could have ever conceived on my own.
As I sat there, thinking with the BB in my hands, I realized that this is a group effort. I no longer have been left alone to try to conceive of anything again. I have been shown by others, who were sober, how and what to do to live a sober life. They showed me the way and continue to do that everyday I have been living this sober life.
This continues to be the start of something big everyday I wake up sober. Everyday is a big day, whether I feel that way or not. Whether I think that way or not. All I have to do is to go to a meeting or get in touch with another alcoholic like myself and I will once again discover just how big this is. I am sober. Wow! How big is that?