Have you ever noticed that for the most part, nothing is ever said about outside issues? Nothing from recent news? Most of what goes on is not germaine to our primary purpose, except when it might affect our sobriiety. But what is that? Perhaps the infection of fear that might enter us, because of so much uncertainty in our times. But, that’s nothing new. All of those who have preceded us went through uncertain times. After all, the 20th Century has been dubbed a century of warfare. Our founders and all who followed them stayed sober through all of this.
I think, if I were to pick out one thing, which might creep into our conciousness and produce an ill effect on any of us, would be the explosion of technology. Everything from advances in medical wonders, faster and smaller computers, advances in the exploration of space, forecasting weather and climate, telecommunications, and so much more. It seems to me that if anything would lead us to question ourselves and our beliefs, especially in the area of our Higher Power, it would be this area.
I think the old concept of knocking down our thoughts of being superior was expressed in the old saw; man can do many things, but he can’t create a blade of grass. Now, as science races at breakneck speed, opening the door to all kinds of things, it makes me wonder. Maybe the next thing is a blade of grass.
Why bring all this up? Because of the question of faith in a power greater than myself. After all that is the basis of our sobriety. That there is something outside of me and my ego, which can help me not to drink and can help change my life from one of unamanageability to one of manageability. And, what if it seems to be that man is that greater power? And my mind will take over, convince me that since I am a man, that I’m bigger, smarter, and back into trying to handle alcohol again.
That may seem a stretch, reaching for something to create a crisis, but I think not. Nothing is more under assault these days than faith. Even without outside issues, our faith is often tested on a daily basis. But we don’t live in a vacuum. We live this life in the world. Feet on the ground. Only occassionaly each day, we step aside and go into rooms with people just like us, and for an hour we withdraw from the outside world and are able to go through a readjustment to our thinking and our feelings. We are able to be reminded of what is most important, and are once again introduced to and through others into our place in the spiritual life.
Today, we talked about the tenth step and its place in our lives. It brought back what it is we need to do on a daily basis to regain balance in our lives. It was a reminder of what it was that I did in the fourth and fifth steps to clear away the wreckage of the past and what it is I must do to maintain this way of life. It’s not about me becoming a saint, but what it is I must do to maintain my sobriety. I remember my sponsor coming home and “emptying out his day”. That is what I must do on a daily basis. Empty out my day and then filling the empty spaces up with the good I have found in this way of life.
It’s just a day at a time. I pray that I may remember to do what I need to do to maintain the hope and the faith in the God of my understanding and renew that relationship, which keeps me on this path. And in the light of reason to guard against all that is corrosive and an influence on this way of life, which performed the miracle of freeing me from the bondage of alcohol…and eventually myself.