We all know from reading the BB what else there is to not drinking a day at a time. Sprnkled in the text and directions shows us a lot more than just abstinence. And, as experience has demonstrated in our lives, these promises not only come true, but there seems to be more to me than I bargained for.
We can all stop at anytime during our day, and, depending on our attitude and state of mind, we can find most or all of these promises active in our lives. I know I can, if I take a step back and look. These, I thik are the benefits of staying and living sober a day at a time. I believe they’re cumulative. The reason I say that is that there seems to be more in my life than just what is written.
For example, the other day I wrote about an antidote to fear. I realize that it was more than that, it was a plus, which permeates all the other areas of my life. It is the solution, which we all sought, whether we knew it or not. I certainly was unaware of it at the time I came into the program. In fact, it was the furtherest thing from my mind.
The spiritual life indeed. Who among us wanted that? But I now know that it’s what really is the basis for true happiness.
My sponsor once told me that what I needed to accomplish in this program was comfort. He told me that if I was comfortable in my own skin that I would never need to drink again. Gradually, over a long period of time, because of my balking and inability to surrender, I grew daily to be more comfortable. It was a slow process to be honest. I was still dragging around a lot of the stuff from the past. It took time to shed a lot of the thoughts and feelings about the old life, including the old fears I used to project. The practice of self pity, and worse, hanging on to old resentments and forming new ones. I have found, that almost unkowingly, I no longer have to do those things or a lot more than that short list. Why? Because it’s uncomfortable.
But this is just part of the whole. What a great thing sobriety is. How grateful I am for having found a way out of my old life and having found a way into this new one. I thank the God of my understanding and the many people, who have supported me and directed me along the way.
Just thinking on a cool Fall day.