I was reminded yesterday of something Tom, my sponsor, used to say to me. A problem shared is a problem cut in half. He said when everything is crowded up inside us we end up with no room to move around and we get stuck inside ourselves. Sharing the problem(s) with someone else gives us elbow room. How true that is.
And, if we’re the one on the receiving end of this sharing what an opportunity to give love to the one sharing. Listening is one of the most valuable assets we have. To be able to sit and listen to another without judgement or comments. We aren’t there to offer or give a solution. We’re there to receive; to take away the poison within the other person. What a gift.
Everyone of us needs to be heard. Everyone of us, at times, needs to expel the thing which may very well poison us. But, everyone of us needs to be open to the one who is in dire need of sharing a troubing situation.
I was thinking of a story my youngest daughter told me the other day. She happened to be with friends in a pretty tough neighborhood in Washington. She said she went outside and was standing there when a great big rough man came over to her. She said he told her he had just gotten out of prison and with tears in his eyes he confessed he felt lost and didn’t know what to do. She just listened to him and gave him a pat on the arm and he went on his way. She listened. He needed someone to listen to him. She in turn performed what he needed most; love.
We can love someone out of taking that next first drink. We can listen. And, when we’re on the brink, and not even knowing it, we can cut a problem in half.
I was thinking about this whole process of sharing and listening. Both are an act of love and may just the thing to help us stay sober today.
TV dinner still cooling?