Thinking today of what it is that I have to do each day, in order to stay sober. First I have to be conscious of the fact that my sobriety is what each day is about. Then I have to make a commitment to stay sober today. To me that means to ask for help and commit myself to do God’s will this day.
Certainly I never ever do this perfectly. It’s just a start. It helps me to remember. It’s not complicated and really very simple. It makes me aware of my primary purpose, so that, when I stumble and get upset, I may be able to recall that I have recourse, other than the thought of a drink. I have the program and the Steps.
It’s not that I ever feel threatened by a drink. I don’t. This program has worked for me the way it was promised in the BB and by my sponsors and old timers. The book said I was restored to sanity and I was, as far as the insanity of the drink is concerned. Anything else is still in question.
However I know that the next drink is still deep within in me. That old alcoholic and alcohol are alive and well just waiting for the opportunity to pull me back. I’m still an alcoholic and still powerless over alcohol. Only the process of this program, the application of the Steps, the principles applied each day protects me. That and my reliance on my higher power and my fellow alcoholics. All this along with a spirit of gratitude for this gift of sobriety, which has been so freely given to me.
I was thinking today that, if I want to stay sober, it’s going to take effort on my part each day. That’s why I thought about what it is that I must do each day. It’s always a question of willingness. Today I’m willing. All this because I picked up a book of Bill W’s. writings.
Good reminder.