We can’t give what we haven’t got. That’s what the BB tells us near the closing before the stories. We’re told that we need to go and get what we lack. The 12 Steps and the experience, which can only be had by learning to take what others offer us and the action which we take as a result. I’m still taking.
I was thinking about that this morning. We can’t give what we haven’t got. I thought, what have I got? A lot of times I think absolutely zero or a very little. I know what one old timer I knew would have said to that. He already had addressed it a long time ago. There was a period, when I refused to talk at meetings. This old timer came up to me one night and asked what was going on with me. I told him that I didn’t think I had anything to offer and just thought I needed to listen. He told me that I had an obligation to talk. I had been in the program ten years at that time and he said I needed to share my experience and if I didn’t he was going to stay in my face.
But that is not always the answer. Sometimes I think there’s something lacking in what I have to offer. And it was right there in the BB in the same paragraph. It tells us to make sure our relationship with God is right. Is that a problem? Sometimes I think it is for me. So this morning I made sure that, if it wasn’t, I was at least going to make an attempt to right the ship.
That’s always key to our sobriety. A right relationship with my higher power. The choice is always there everyday. And that choice demands that I make a decision. Just as all actions in this program ask of me. Make up your mind. Just as it talks about making a conscious contact with God, so I have to make a conscious decision to do that. It means that I have to be aware of what I am doing. Am I? If I want to stay sober, I can’t sleep my way into a right relationship.
I know that’s a question posed to us in the 11th Step. What happens if I get complacent? If I rest on my laurels? What I did last year and last month is no longer in play. The answer is trouble. And that trouble can lead to a drink.
So, this morning, as I was thinking about all of this, I made sure to take the time to wake up and made a decision to improve my conscious contact with God.