Bill tells us in Tradition 4 that the very acme of humility is the ability to laugh at oneself. Wow. When I came into this program I couldn’t laugh at anything. I didn’t see any humor in life. Especially in myself.
One of the obstacles I found in finding humor in myself, was my enormous ego. My self centered obsession with me. I was too worried about what others might think and how they saw me. I often had fits of anger and resentment, when something I said or did brought chuckles from those around me. In a word, I was too much. I was in violation of Rule # 62: “Don’t take yourself too damn seriously”.
One of the weapons I have found in this program against a drink, is a smile.
Took me a long time to be able to smile without rupturing my facial muscles and being able to unclench my teeth. Eventually I found that a simple smile can brighten up a room. A frown does just the opposite.
Being able to laugh at myself, especially when I make a mistake, came over time and the change in attitude I experienced as a result of working these steps. I found it to be the antidote for what was wrong with me. It broke down the barriers between myself and others, especially in this program, but also in other relationships.
It helped me immensely in growing along spiritual lines. It assisted me in establishing a perspective in my relaltionship with my higher power. Through it I came to understand just who was in charge.
One thing I laugh at in writing this is that I have hardly reached the “acme” of humility. I think I’m just a bit away from the border of its territory. Maybe by a few hundred thousand miles. Oh, well, at least I’m sober.
Anyway, after I read the last page in Tradition 4, I was reminded of what my attitude should be in all my affairs. It reminds me of my place in the scheme of things and that helps me to stay sober. That makes me grateful.