Sitting here tonight I had to think of the cause of so much gratitude today. The First Step. A young woman with a few months asked to talk about this Step and it was amazing to hear the responses from so many in the room.
What I heard and thought was how much gratitude this Step inspired in those who shared. I know most of their stories and know what brought this on. Having found this program and being introduced to what opened the door to freedom, not only from the bondage of alcohol, but from the hell we all lived in and almost died from. Who wouldn’t be grateful?
As a result of our surrender to our being powerless, most of us have accumulated a lot of years, living in a world of exact opposites. What one of us could ever have imagined, when we came in, that such a surrender and acceptance of being powerless would give us such peace and serenity over the long haul? Almost everyone was able to tell this woman what disaster had befallen our lives until that moment, when we gave up and asked for help. And how we won a new way of life as a result.
That’s what I was thinking about tonight, as I sat there and reflected on today’s meeting. From hell to a group of people, who helped us change, and continue to do so every day we come to meetings to be reminded about what it is we need to do each day to maintain this way of life. There I was, sitting out back this evening, staring into the night and experiencing the peace that it offered. All this despite everything else that is going on in my life.
All I could do was to thank my higher power for this gift I have been given; sobriety. A sober way of living and thinking. A spiritual answer I didn’t even know existed, until I walked through these doors. I even mentioned that to the woman, as I took my turn. I told her how, when I opened the BB for the first time, I looked through the book and there it was. A chapter entitled There Is A Solution. How much hope that gave to me, when I saw that and then read what it was.
I was also grateful, when I saw many of the women in attendance walk over and talk to her afterward.
Every time we talk about this Step, it’s a refresher course in where I came from and how I’ve grown into the best way of life my higher power could have ever given to me. Like the woman in the BB said, I get everything I need in this program. Not always what I want, thank God, but what I need. And like she said, and when I get what I need, I find out it’s what I wanted all along.