Pain is the touchstone of all spiritual growth. I not only learned that in here, but have also experienced this myself. In fact, talking to a member today, who told me how he not only hit his bottom to come in here, but also hit a few bottoms in this program, which led to spiritual growth. Me too, as I said.
It brought up the thought about our problems. We all have problems. Everyone has them at one time or another. Very common. Universal. The only problem is how we deal with them.
Once again, it reminds me of the Second Step. My acceptance of a Higher Power in my life. Learning to begin to live a spiritual way of life. If I truly believe, and have the hope and faith this program has offered me, this is exactly where I place my problems. Or try to. Depends where I’m at.
Problems can lead to inner pain, regardless of what the problem is. And, as I have learned, pain is inevitable. It’s suffering, which is optional. I can be in pain, but I don’t have to suffer. The pain is enough. It’s suffering, the emotional response, which often accompanies whatever it is. Fear, self pity, worry, projection, anger, even hatred, give it any name we want, it is in itself compounding whatever it is I am suffering from. It also can delay whatever solution is being offered to me. Particularly the spiritual solution. Because it delays the necessary acceptance. Or worse, lead to a drink.
Again, it may begin with that Second Step, but it goes on to the Third and the rest of the Steps. I can remember stumbling and falling a lot in this program. Hitting new bottoms, as my friend reminded me, and finding the relief I needed, once I began to move on. I had created problems for myself, which were entirely unnecessary, but inevitable for someone like me. Perhaps a learning process, which I may have needed to learn that I don’t have to pick up a drink. Alcohol is not a solution for me or my problems.
When I think about my problems and what I have learned in here, I cannot help but be grateful. To my Higher Power, of course. But, as always, all my friends and acquaintances I have made in here, who have helped me through my time in here.
Just thinking about my primary purpose. My need to stay sober and to help another alcoholic, who is suffering.