Today at our meeting we found ourselves opening up about our human defects. Over and over again, those talking, admitted to being weak human beings and not saints. Our faults and defects and the need to practice the Tenth Step axiom were repeated again and again.
I think I have admitted my blunders in here. I mean, here I am, sober a day at a time, each and everyday in here. Always I have to admit that it’s up to my Higher Power that I am given what I need to do what I have been doing staying sober. And I am grateful for all I have been given, but have to say that I don’t believe that I really am a spiritual person. Just trying.
Even those, who seemed to be more devoted spiritual persons, had to admit that they too were human and just as puzzled in how they could find they were off track and into faults and defects. My sponsor often told me that I was going to find myself stumbling back into my human junk. I was told that this would last right up to the end, no matter what. I was simply to pick myself up and dust myself off and keep on keeping on. His directions.
That’s why, we all admitted today, we need to go to meetings regularly. A day at a time for most of us. Almost all admitted that, when they pulled back and did not get to meetings on a regular basis, they would find themselves drifting back into their old way of thinking and acting. Almost all said this was a danger for alcoholics like ourselves and could end up getting us drunk again.
Anyway, I know how I felt about all of this. It was a reminder to me that I had to continue to go to meetings daily. To be able to attend and be reminded of what it is I need to do each and everyday to stay sober. And more than one person reminded us that we needed to learn how to stay in the day and not project ahead. To know where are feet are at any moment and stay right there. Nor were we to go back into the past and relive it. We were reminded that we are only here and no place else at any given moment.
I was glad that we had this meeting and these reminders of what it is we need to do each and everyday. Made me grateful.