One of the things, which has played a big part in my sobriety, are those I have known through the years. I was telling someone at the meeting today how they have an openness and a willingness to challenge and correct me, when I’m wrong or off base. On the other hand, when they are struggling, they are willing to share and allow me to try to give them a hand.
Sometimes all of us fail to see the forest for all the trees. Something within us makes us blind to what’s really going on. We get stuck and don’t see where we’re wrong and need help in getting ourselves out of the ditch we have dug. And that’s often because we think we’re right and doing the right thing. A good time to look at the Tenth Step and see what’s going on with us.
For instance I was talking to an old friend today. Like so many of us have done in the past, he was caught up in a man, who seems to constantly struggling, though not drinking for a lot of years. We can fail to see that some people are not going to let anyone change their mind about anything. My sponsor told me that, when I find myself trying to help someone like this, to stop. Others, who are willing and want this program, are there waiting for help.
This is especially true, when the object of our desire to help, is suffering from emotions, which are governing their lives. Anger, worry, anxiety, fear, prejudice, and resentments. I know that I have discovered over the years that I have never been able to change someone’s mind, who doesn’t want to listen.
To me I find that such a situation is the first part of the Serenity Prayer. Things I’m powerless to change and I have to let go and let the God of my understanding do for me, what I cannot. To let go and accept. To surrender and experience the peace I have forgotten. Not always an easy job for someone like me. But do-able, if I will try.
However it is a lesson to me just how powerful our emotions can be, when we can witness how someone else’s life is being run by them. All reason gone. They are governing a person’s thoughts and actions. A good lesson on why I need to be paying attention and not allowing damaging emotions to take over. They can definitely lead to a drink.
This is where I need to spend some thoughtful time in the presence of my Higher Power and come to peace with not only myself, but those around me. I definitely need to rest in the sunlight of the spirit and not in the dark shadows of my emotions. I don’t ever want to drink again and I need the help I have been given over time. I need it every day. I need to be awake and aware and not drift off into complacency.
And that reminds me that should start each day with a positive attitude. Like that old timer I knew back years ago would say, attitudes are everything. They’re more important than facts. In fact they can change the facts. A positive attitude can change a dark day into a bright day.
Anyway I was grateful for our talk today. I hope it helped. I know it helped me and I’m in a better place because of it.