Probably one of the most important topics today was the First Step. One suggestion was the second part of that Step, but in the end it was the first part which took over: We admitted we were powerless over alcohol…and then the second part appeared: …that our lives had become unmanageable.
The reason the first part appeared as the topic was because most of us had been whipped by the alcohol we were drinking, and the answer came, when we surrendered and were given the freedom we all needed from alcohol. Real sobriety. Freedom from alcohol. I could never ever forget that.
In fact what came up for me, after I had been sober in AA, was the fact that I had somehow made the assumption that it was me who had achieved sobriety. I had forgotten that it was my Higher Power. And it was my old sponsor, who woke me up. He had me read the Second Step, and that was when I became aware of the need to practice and live a spiritual life, along with my introduction to my Higher Power.
He told me that I didn’t know that I didn’t know. I only thought I did. And that was what knocked the wind out of me. My terrible wrong emotions were once again running my life like they did when I was drinking. I found out that I had to step back and begin to listen and learn what I didn’t know and to begin to let go and change my way of thinking. And, over time I did.
And that was how the subject of the second part of the First Step came up. The unmanageable part came up for alcoholics like me, who were being ruled by my negative emotions. They were still running my mind and my life. I had to begin to step back and rid myself of them over time, and grow in beginning to think with my rational mind, which alcohol had taken over. And eventually I did.
This was a good meeting for me and others, because it opened the door to address recently new people, some of whom had begun to think they knew what they are doing. I know I and another friend were able to talk to one of these new people, and we were hopeful we would be able not just to hear from him, but to be able to help him like we were helped.
Anyway, I had read the first paragraph in the Jan. 6 page of the 24 Hour a Day book, which a friend of mine had printed and passed to do just that. It made me grateful. And I know my friend and I were grateful also to our Higher Power, and all those who had helped us along the way. We owe them so much.