After talking to a number of people over the years and another one today something that has been said over and over became clear; very few of us ever fit in before we came to the program. I heard a woman speaker at our upstate convention, who said that about her family. She never felt she fit in.
When talking to my friend down in Md. today, he said the same thing. I told him that on my arrival at my first meeting how for the first time I felt I had come home. Strange isn’t it?
And then we talked about what a lot of members talk about. The expression of love, which is extended to us all by our fellow alcoholics. My friend told how it was members, who came and took care of his mother, as she lay dying. The same in my family. When my mother and younger brother were dying, one of my old friends up here came over and helped relieve me to step outside, while he talked to them. A number, whom I did not know, came to my house, the wakes, and the funerals. Amazing.
What was wrong with people like us from the beginning is a mystery to me. But the fact that I came here and found my new family is not. I’ve seen this over and over again. I’ve heard others say the same thing. I see it everyday at meetings. The number of friendships developed in here is overwhelming.
We are not alone. I should say no longer alone. Such lonely people, isolated by booze, and freed and returned to a world we never seemed to know before. All because we chose to come here and stay, working the program as directed, freed from the bondage of alcohol. And as we grow in this program, in my experience, the changes I have experienced opened a new world for me.
The promises coming true. The new freedom and new happiness, the peace and serenity, the freedom from so many fears, and having found a higher power, who can do for me, what I can’t for myself. And the many spiritual awakenings made available by these Steps have made my life so worthwhile.
But what has become obvious over time is the courage I have been given by my higher power and this program. That word didn’t come to mind until I reached the Ninth Step. One of the “requirements” to proceed with my amends. It’s in the BB. And it has grown since. It’s not that fear is present, but I know I can proceed in spite of that.
Anyway, I was thinking about the friendship and love I have experienced in this program. The acceptance of one another. The extended hand of help and encouragement. Tough love in the beginning and the warm friendships developing as I grew. How can I not be but grateful?