We’re told that we can’t give what we haven’t got. The BB tells us then to go get it.
A couple of us were sitting with a man, who is struggling to get the program. A well educated man, who is in trouble because of his drinking. An alcoholic. He’s come down in life, because of his drinking and has been suspended from his duties. As a result he can no longer give what he didn’t have.
I thought about that; what he didn’t have. Sounds judgmental, but my guess is that it was a message he had lost or didn’t have in the first place. Whatever, alcohol had taken it away from him.
Most of us, who have gotten sober, realize that when we came in we were spiritually bankrupt. Through our drinking we had been cut off from the sunlight of the spirit and were living in darkness within. It’s always the same with the alcoholic. When we hit our bottom, we are ready to do anything to relieve the pain alcohol has brought about in our lives. It’s sobriety and a total change in our lives, which is needed at this point.
That’s where I arrived, when I came into the program. I had nothing to give. Alcohol had taken it all away. But, that was the problem; I didn’t want to take. My pride and arrogance told me that I was smart enough and I didn’t have to humble myself and accept this simple program, as it was presented to me. I couldn’t see that I was going to have to unlearn all that I thought I knew and replace it with a spiritual way of life found in the Twelve Steps. Or, I could do what I had always done, which was to try to solve my life in a drink. And, of course, die an alcoholic death.
It was that truth, which turned me around and brought me to my knees. By myself I was helpless and hopeless. It was only through the good graces of others that I could obtain this gift so freely offered to me. I was going to have to accept the program, as written by our founders. The evidence was overwhelming. Men and women, just like myself, were sober and happy and willing to give me a way out of the dilemma I was in. I had to learn to take before I would be able to give. It was my first lesson in a most necessary virtue; humility.
I couldn’t help but think about this, as I sat with those two men today. I had to take before I could give. And what I received was of such an enormous
value that I could not hold onto it. It had to be given away.