These past couple of days I was reminded of something I had quite forgotten, which at one time was part of this program for me. That was the prayer in the Eleventh Step in the 12&12. The prayer of St. Francis, which I assumed was one of Bill W.’s favorites.
I remember this prayer from the past and then in the program. I used to say this prayer on a regular basis. But over time I somehow drifted away from it. However someone brought this prayer up again yesterday and my mind went back to a number of thoughts and phrases, which had often inspired me in the process of changing. It was a prayer that made me think of a number of things I needed to do and often did, as a result of praying this way.
The thought of being in a state of mind, where peace became a primary purpose in life. Care and understanding. Forgiveness. All these began to become part of my life through this program. It’s not that I have forgotten the need for these virtues. They are definitely part of why I am here. But, like I said the resource of this prayer drifted away. I can’t remember why. It just did.
The reason this all came up was I have been going through what has become a stressful time for me and I had to go back and look at what this prayer said. I’ve been wrestling with some thoughts I need to find a way to let go of. It concerns a proposition I’ve been presented with, which has caused some negative thinking within. A wrestling match I don’t care to go through.
I know the answer to this, as it is in almost every thing I have been faced with over time, is spiritual. I need to learn how to let go and hand it over to my Higher Power. I know it’s part of the Serenity Prayer. The Eleventh Step. It began back when I was introduced to the Second Step and went on into the Third and the rest of the Steps.
Anyway I was glad this prayer came up. I pray that I may contemplate the heart and soul of what it is telling me and follow the directions within. I know, for me, it is definitely part of the spiritual foundation I have found in here, which supports my sobriety. And that’s where I need to center my mind on. To remember why I came here. I came to get sober and to change my life for the better. Something alcohol had denied me. I never want to forget my purpose and to do what I need to remain sober. I am grateful for what I have received. What I have been given.