One of the things my sponsor warned me about came up during one of the men’s reply at the meeting today. Never make a decision at night.
He explained that to me after he told me. He said that the kind of people we are will definitely make a mistake because at those hours we tend to have negative emotions. Fear, depression, worry, self pity, and so on. We might not even be aware of it at the moment. Only later will it come out.
After he said this it hit me. That’s exactly what I was doing last night, when I woke up in the middle of the night and was thinking about things. And there I was thinking about what I should do about this or that. None of it positive. All of it was negative. What junk.
But then, as I sat there listening, I remembered that something made me stop in the middle of all of this thinking. I began to pray. Just came on automatically. Made me grateful to remember that. All I can do is attribute it to what I learned in here from my sponsor and those old timers. That and putting these Steps into action over the years. Especially the Second and the Eleventh.
All of this came up as we were talking about the slogan, Easy Does It. And again I was reminded of what my sponsor said, when he explained that to me. He said, easy does it, but do it. In other words don’t rest on my laurels. One thing not to push myself, but another thing to tell myself it’s all right to be lazy and do nothing. That’s not what I learned in this program. But it is something which comes up from time to time. To lay back and do nothing. Talk about my defects.
The difference between being positive and negative. That was another reminder in the meeting today. Many who spoke talked about all of these things today and how they too were being reminded of what’s important. What our sober thinking is all about. And the emphasis was on the spiritual foundation of this program.
I need to remember who is control and who doesn’t have control. As one person said, in thinking about all of this, it reminded them of the Serenity Prayer. Learning to accept what I’m powerless over and turning it over to my Higher Power. Much of that being brought up in the meeting and reminding me of what it is I definitely need to do on a daily basis.
Anyway, I knew after I got home that I needed to sit down and take time to meditate over these things. Just thinking about my staying sober.