Probably nothing pays off as much in my trying to stay sober as trying to practice these principles in all of my affairs.
When I can mind my own business and keep my thoughts to myself, peace and serenity follow. But, when I barge in and open my mouth, that’s when the trouble starts for me.
Part of this practice for me comes when I really try to understand where the other party is coming from. Not always easy. Especially when I’m prejudiced to start with. When I assume something, which very well may have no foundation in reality. Or, when I have a resentment of some sort.
I sometimes have to remember the Prayer of St. Francis. That part, which asks that I may seek to understand rather than be understood. Easier said than practiced. But, if I can at least be prepared, then there’s less chance of me messing up my relationships with others.
And that’s what this is all about. Sobriety, I mean. To live a sober life means to me my relationships with others. The BB tells me that in my past that I loved but few, was indifferent to the many, and hated the rest. Not a pleasant picture. The 4th Step in the 12&12 draws a pretty grim picture of what was wrong, when it discusses broken and twisted relationships with family, friends, and society at large. That tornado, which was me, roaring through the lives of others.
Over time and attempting to work these 12 Steps, I have changed for the better and been able to improve in relating to others. Like I said, it’s what living sober is all about. Using the spiritual changes this program has made in me and taking them out into the world to others. How? To be the best example of what this program is all about. Not preaching but practicing.
For the most part it can be a challenge everyday. But what makes it easier is to remember that I only have to do this for today. Not for yesterday or tomorrow. Just for now. And then I have the help of my higher power and the friends I have in AA.
Perfect? No way. But surely better than what I was like in the past. I’m still going to make mistakes. I guess that’s to be expected. But always I have a chance to do better. After all, I have these Steps to rely on. They work. Besides, I have the example of others to look to, when I waver or get discouraged.