Last night I was reading something about the Steps by a very spiritual man. As I read it I was made aware of something I have experienced, but never stopped to think about it. Especially this way. What was it? The whole ball of wax.
He pointed out that the average individual, who needs some kind of assistance, might take care of some mental problem, separately, with a counselor. A physical problem with a doctor. And might go to church or someplace else about their spiritual needs. But the recovering alcoholic in this program? We get the whole thing together and get better and better. Physically, mentally, and spiritually. Just by working this program.
The realization of what he was saying almost took my breath away. Wow! And what he said is true. I needed a healing, as one of our members put it today. And that’s exactly what I have experienced in this program.
When I came into this program I was physically, mentally, and spiritually a wreck. Physically I was soaked in alcohol. Damage of all kinds. I had to first get some of this stuff out of me before I could even begin to think, as far as this disease is concerned. And when I finally began to make sense out of what was going on in here, I was to discover that I had this black hole down within me. The absence of spirituality I desperately needed, if I was ever to get free of the bondage of alcohol. I learned I had a disease that was incurable. I wanted sobriety and a spiritual awakening, a restoration to sanity, was the only path open to someone like me.
Today I looked around the room and listened to others in the same boat as I am. What they were saying gave me evidence of what the spiritual man had said about the Steps and this program. Physically, mentally, and spiritually, the whole ball of wax altogether, we are being healed a day at a time. Absolutely amazing, when I stop and think about it.
Does that mean I’m free of problems. Absolutely not. I’m a human being. All I have to do is read the BB and I can see that clearly. Or, if I go to meetings and listen to others like myself. And that came up in the meeting. The need we have to exercise what those old timers, and as I learned today, Fr. Martin, talked about. The “I” over the “E”. The practice of the intellect over my emotions. Just what my sponsor told me to do. Think with my head and not my heart. I know when I let my emotions direct my mind and my life I’m headed for trouble. And I don’t want to go there. I need to become mature emotionally, as Bill W. and others talked about.
Anyway it was a good meeting today, where this was pretty much discussed. Everyone agreed it was. And that brings to mind one of the most important things in my sobriety. I can’t stay sober by myself. I need the people like myself, who are practicing the same thing. That’s why meetings and personal contact is so important. I never want to forget that.
Once more I have to express just how grateful I am for what I have found and been given by so many others and my Higher Power.