One of the great gifts of this program is not just the freedom from alcohol. It is a better way of life than ever could be imagined. At least that’s what happened to me and a lot of other alcoholics I’ve known in this program.
For one thing, just being freed from the way of life alcohol had held me in, I started to feel the beginning of peace and happiness within myself. And I’ve heard that from a lot of those, who also began to experience that early on in this program. But, again, over time in here, especially as the result of that Second Step, the door within me began to open into a new way of living, as a result of what I was starting to do a day at a time through these Steps and this spiritual way of life.
A lot of this had to do with thinking and living habits, which these Steps were helping me to get rid of. Defects and negative emotions were beginning to leave me within and without, as a result of the effects of these Steps. Not only was I letting go of these, but I was starting to learn a new way of thinking, and also my commitment to my Higher Power, the spiritual life I was starting to practice and live. Plus I was trying to practice helping others like myself, which would empty my mind of myself and focus on others besides myself.
I think one of the most amazing things was the effects of these Steps were helping me to stop focusing on blaming others for the negative things I once judged them to be responsible for, and being able to accept my own responsibility of my thoughts and actions, Along the way in these Steps I began to be able to open my mind to what I was truly responsible for, but to also able to see clearly that many I thought were guilty of hurting me, had no part in what I was blaming them for. A lot of this became more clear, when I was making amends. But even more became apparent in my backing up and taking a look at my intentions which I had formed, in order to escape the blame I deserved, which was the result of my negative emotions. It all began with fear and self pity, and then moved on to anger, rage, resentments, self pity, and on and on.
Anyway, all this definitely began to help me to experience peace and a commitment to care and have compassion for others, which I had never ever done before. I could be open to new acquaintances, I had avoided because of my self centered anger. This all has been the result of what this program has given to me. And all of this is what my Higher Power is providing me with, as well as my old sponsor and those old timers, who have taught me and supported me. And I also have to be grateful to others around me, who continue give me what I need. Thanks.