Let go and let God. That was brought up at a meeting today. I really haven’t heard that phrase in a long long time. Good to hear it. But it made me think: Do I ever really do that?
The other subject was “why am I here?”. It tied right into the other subject. At least those who spoke did.
As I listened to them share, I was struck by the thoughts of many of these people. I mean, that I could identify with them. Especially why they came here and how that entrance into the program changed all of our lives. I was particularly touched by one woman, who told how that change helped her to deal with her son, when she found out that he had only six months left to live. Really made me stop and think about the first subject.
For myself, I think that Let go and let God is dependent on circumstances, rather than an absolute rule in my life. Especially whenever something comes up that causes a struggle within myself to control a situation, which I have no power over. My tendency always is to hang on and not let go of it. My self will resists, because I want the outcome to be mine and mine alone. And that’s when I need the help of others the most. To help me let go of it and to abandon myself to God. It always amazes me, after the fact, how blinded I am by my ego and my pride.
However, I was glad that we talked about this today. It made me really stop and think about what it is I should be doing to help me stay sober today. It brought me back to that sentence in the BB: Of myself I am nothing, my Father does the work. I need to keep that in mind and remember my dependency on my higher power. How much I need both God and the group.