That spiritual axiom in the 12&12, whenever we’re disturbed there is something wrong with us, came up on a call today. I try to remember that all the time. It’s not what the other person is doing, that’s their problem. My problem, where I’m wrong, is what is it in me that set me off?
I was talking to an old friend today and it was the arguments he had gotten into, where he didn’t let go of them. He said he found himself getting deeper and deeper into them. I asked him, what I often ask myself, when was the last time you got someone to change their mind? I’ve never changed any ones mind. Ever. He said the same thing. But he was disturbed.
Going through the literature this afternoon, I came across a number of things and one of them referred to our anger. That anger is the dubious luxury of normal men. To us it’s poison. It cuts us off from the sunlight of the spirit. Resentments, which he had, and, when I get angry, the same thing, are the result of our anger and can lead to a drink. Absolutely poison.
We talked about the solution, which is always spiritual. The 10th Step and then prayer and meditation. Stepping aside and settling down in solitude and spending time with our Higher Power. Surrendering to our being powerless over others and turning them over to that Power and letting go. Not always easy, but do-able. If I mean what I’m saying that I want to practice these principles in all of my affairs and stay sober, I will surrender and do this very thing. Letting go and letting God.
I was reminded of another call from another old friend this morning, who started his conversation off with, in spiritual matters it’s dangerous to go it alone. I need to remember that and it’s exactly what the man I was talking to above was doing. Good reminder for me.