Had opportunities which helped me and I hope some of these I talked to today. I had to travel away from being able to go to meetings for a couple of days and sharing with others definitely brought my mind to where it should be. Staying sober a day at a time.
One of the things we all talked about were how our negative emotions affected us. Not a lot of good stuff. Part of what was affecting those I talked to were their feelings toward families and close acquaintances. These emotional hang ups dealt with anger, resentments, anxiety, fear, self pity, and a lot more. All of them damaging, not so much on others, as ourselves.
We did talk about stopping our day and starting over. Taking a deep breath and stepping back and being quiet for whatever time we could make for ourselves. To step aside and perhaps go off by ourselves if possible. To pray and ask for help. If possible to be quiet and maybe a brief meditation or contemplation. To change our negative attitude into a positive attitude. Then to change our expression to a positive one. A smile and a pleasant greeting or thoughts with others. That’s one step, which we were asked to do back a long time ago by our sponsors and old timers. It works.
Today we all talked about hope, faith, and love or compassion. And of course perseverance. Not letting go and continuing to try to practice a spiritual way of life. Saying the Serenity Prayer and perhaps the Prayer of St. Francis in the Eleventh Step in the 12&12. And of course going to meetings and listening and participating.
Anyway I know these talks all helped me to settle and focus on why I am here. I can only hope it was helpful to others as it was to me.
Nothing is perfect. We’re all imperfect. Like the BB tells us we’re human and not saints. I know over time in here I have learned that the only Step I can work perfectly is the First. The rest my faults and weaknesses are going to force me to continue to learn and do better over time. But no matter how long I’m able to stay sober, I am going to find myself stumbling and bumbling. But like my old sponsor told me I had to learn to pick myself up, dust myself off, and keep on keeping on.
Truly I am grateful to had the opportunities I had today. It reminded me of the Second Step, which opened the door to this program for me. My hope, faith, and dependency on my Higher Power. And of course all those in the program who have reached out and helped me along this way. Thanks.