Talking to a few people today, I was reminded of two of our most powerful tools. Sharing and understanding.
These were two things I really knew nothing about before I came to this program. And, when I did get here, they were two things I wanted nothing to do with. I lacked trust and understanding of others. I was going to have to go through a number of phases before the door opened to sharing and understanding.
The first thing for me was to establish hope. Hope that this would get better. Hope that I could get better. And that hope I found by listening hearing the stories of those sober alcoholics I saw at meetings. And that hope was to be the foundation of the beginning of some sort of faith. The start of trust.
Along with that hope there came another phase. That was not only listening, but also observing these sober people. And that’s when I began to see something so different in these people, which began the process of prying the door ajar, behind which was hidden a closed mind. And what I saw were men and women, who understood the alcoholic. Most of them I discovered could tell my story without me opening my mouth. I was to learn that if I started a sentence most of them could finish it for me.
My first venture into breaking out of myself came, when I got a sponsor. I found I could talk to him and, instead of laughing at me, he understood. What a revelation. And, as I looked around at others, after this discovery, I saw the same in them. Oh, there are always exceptions. But I can avoid those people by just observing them and moving on.
Over time I have come to depend on the understanding of others. I know I can trust it. And I have learned to understand through them and their examples. And then my experiences in sharing and receiving the sharing of others has produced a lot of results over time in here. It’s kind of part of the backbone of my sobriety and certainly proof to me that I can’t stay sober by myself.
But in all of this there is the spiritual element. The foundation of this program. Over time I came to hear things in their expression of understanding and sharing, which would at times enter into me and open the door to my Higher Power. Nothing hard and fast, but definitely it was there. And it’s still part of the picture.
Just thinking about this process and the results I have received makes me grateful and happy that I am part of this program. That I’m sober. How much I owe to all those who gave me their understanding and shared their lives with me.