I was reminded today by a dear friend of mine that, when all else fails work with another alcoholic. It’s not that I forget these things, but sometimes they fade into the background behind all this other “stuff” in my life.
One of the things I found that happens, when I am working with an alcoholic, who is seeking help of some sort, is that I’m the beneficiary. I may not think that at the time, but in the end it comes to me in the form of a real happiness within.
Funny how that works. I can be in real difficulty with myself, when suddenly the opportunity to work with someone else pops up. If I will just not pass the moment up, but stop and open my mind and then my heart, wonderful things seem to happen in spite of me. Sometimes I find myself stunned by the gratitude, which swells up within me.
The odd thing about all of this is that I can walk away from these encounters and think to myself, did I really help this person? Often I don’t know, but it doesn’t seem to matter at the moment, because of the effect it has on me. I’m not talking about getting full of myself and my ego. It is something else outside of my explanation of what it is. It’s like a bonus for taking the time to help someone else other than myself.
That’s definitely another plus in the process of taking the time to step aside from my own cares and think of helping someone else. I stop thinking about me. It’s really a relief. My only job at the moment is to pay attention to someone else’s needs. How great is that?
Besides, the BB tells us that nothing will insure our sobriety than intensive work with other alcoholics. I know that early on, when there were no rehabs, even detoxes, or hospitals open to treating an alcoholic, I would find that I didn’t want to go out on a 12th Step call any number of times. But my sponsor wouldn’t hear of it and I would get dragged along protesting all the way. And, when I would get there, I would find that my attitude was turned around. And, yes, I would end up being the beneficiary of that call.
So, when I received my friend’s message today, a person I have known for 39 years and whom I have great value and respect for, I had to pause and step back and think about what she had said. Just a reminder how nice it is to be able to form lasting friendships in this program. I’m still learning a lot from them. And I’m truly grateful.