Today someone brought up emotional stuff. And that sent me off in a direction I know we all should go. And that’s into the basics of this program. My first thought was the 12&12.
I guess this was something another old timer went to. He talked about the Tenth, Eleventh, and Twelfth Steps. My first thought was the spiritual axiom in that Tenth Step. Whenever we’re disturbed the problem is ours. It’s up to me to find what’s wrong with me and to do something about it. To go to that Eleventh Step and ask for help, and then the Twelfth to get out of myself and help someone else like me.
The rest of it is talking to our sponsors or other sober alcoholics in this program about what’s wrong with us. All of this reminded me of Bill W., when he was on a dry drunk and he talked to Fr. Dowling, doing his complete Fifth Step, and beginning to practice the spiritual way of life. I often go back and think about those moments. That’s because I had some of the same with my old sponsor and some of those old timers in here. It always woke me up and made me think about my Higher Power.
Once again I was reminded of what it used to be like in meetings back years ago. We talked about the Steps and Traditions. Personal problems were left for after the meetings. Talking to our sponsors or others. But we kept going there and learning how this program works. Then we went and got rid of whatever was bothering us and got directions as to what we needed to do.
Anyway, no matter what, I found that I’ve been given gratitude to express to my Higher Power and all those, who have helped me along the way in here. I still go back and think of what I need to. And that’s staying sober a day at a time. And that always encourages me.
And I was also reminded today that I never ever want to ever drink alcohol again. That’s exactly why I surrendered to that First Step, even before I knew anything about it. Anyway I just needed to remind myself, as always. Thanks.