Once again we had a “new member” in the meeting today. Will they get sober? They appeared to be too confused in a sense. No one could really determine this. But it always has a few things, which can happen to any of us.
Even though we all seemed to be willing to go out of our way to share our own getting sober in here with them, the very fact we are sober ourselves, helps us to be grateful for the gift we have been given. It always reminds me of the miracle, which occurred for me, that I really never merited sobriety, because I had never done what would have earned that for me. I had begged my Higher Power to help me stop drinking alcohol. And he did. I know I promised him I would do anything he wanted me to do, if he would. And he did.
The other thing was my looking back at how I have changed over time in here being sober. Somehow, putting these Steps into action and hopefully growing spiritually in here, I have been given peace and happiness, and, of course, the gift of faith, hope, and love. Moreover a willingness to help others like ourselves, as we were doing today.
All of this and more was apparent today to me. But I also know that these are gifts I have been given, which I never ever thought I deserved. Yet, here they are. And more, as I am well aware of. So, my hope this person will be able to get sober and have the same thing in their life. Time will tell.
Anyway, despite their seemingly dark expression, I can only guess that it’s what is going on within, and hopefully they will be given the grace and light we all need. I can remember how I must have appeared to those old timers, who told me that I didn’t appear like I wanted to get sober or sound like I did. I didn’t know that’s how I was, and it was part of what happened to begin to change some of my thinking back then. The other was when I was told that I didn’t know that I didn’t know. I only thought I did. I know I still had to struggle to change, but over time I did.
I know I need to let go and hope. It’s all any of us can do. But I still am grateful for the gifts I have been given.