Talking to an old friend today, we both spoke about two of the great benefits of this program. Peace of mind and serenity.
Perhaps, my friend said, this is real happiness. Bill W. tells us that happiness is a byproduct of right living. And right living, we agreed, is living all 12 Steps of this program. And no one, as Bill said, is going to work this program perfectly, except for the 1st Step.
The spiritual awakening, which is the beginning phrase of the 12th Step, at least I believe, begins at the end of the 9th Step. After I have done all the other Steps before that. A logical, progressive method of cleaning up our alcoholic lives and putting them in order. The result is a psychic change. A complete reversal of thinking, attitudes, and motives in preparation for a new relationship with my higher power, the God of my understanding.
However, I am also aware at this moment that I can, and sometimes still do, very easily lose this state of mind. Serenity and peace of mind can be ruptured by the emotional effects of my character defects. Particularly anger and resentments. I know that it’s up to me to maintain awareness, one of the keys to a spiritual life. When I forget, I’m in danger of not only losing what I have gained, but my sobriety.
It reminds me that I’m not done in applying these 12 Steps to my life. Everyday is a day, when I need to put these Steps into action. It’s not all that overwhelming. In truth it’s simple. Only I can complicate this process, when I balk and become unwilling, because I find it easier to be seduced by my emotions and character defects.
I was grateful for that “meditation” I had with my friend today. I had to think of how I am helped always by these communications with others. One alcoholic talking to another.