Behavior. Now there’s a word I used to hear a lot about from childhood on up. It usually came up at home and school, because of my bad behavior. Not really bad at that time. Just misbehavior, which would bring about scolding or something more severe. Of course, during my drinking days, it really was bad behavior. That tornado in the lives of others.
But behavior today is something else. Something far more important than I ever once conceived. For instance, it’s often been said that we might be the only copy of the BB that someone might read. In other words, to be an example of what it means to be sober. That entirely depends on my behavior.
In the Third Step Prayer, it talks about this. Take away my difficulties that victory over them may bear witness to those that I would serve… I guess that means that through God’s grace and these Steps that perhaps I may become some sort of an example of how this program works. If I’m still acting and living like I did, when I came in, I’m sure that no one, who wants to get sober would or should want what I have to offer. I can only hope that I would be better than that.
I’m not talking about cosmetic surgery, where I just pretend that I’m something better than I was. This new behavior has to come as a result of working these Twelve Steps. The psychic change, which is the spiritual awakening. That change in personality which all sober alcoholics seek and need, in order to stay sober.
I don’t think it’s something of which I necessarily have to be conscious. I’ve thought about this from time to time, because I remember so many members, back in my early days of AA. People with whom I had little or no contact. They were just men and women I saw at meetings, but their example had a great influence on me. They probably never even knew of the help they gave me by their example; their behavior. The evidence of their sobriety.
Anyway, it was just something I have been thinking about over a long period of time.