Interesting way to start a day in this program. A good friend of mine called and was discussing his thoughts and reactions to his life. It’s amazing how on the one hand we want to justify what we’re doing and on the other are ready to condemn ourselves.
As I sat and listened to him one thought kept coming up. He impressed me. In spite of all his thinking, he hadn’t taken a drink. We talked about that and he, like myself, never wanted to drink again. Just imagine. That was part of what was behind the call.
But the bottom line is why we are the way we are. And like one spiritual writer pointed out, we may be trying to live a spiritual way of life, but we are not saints. We’re human beings. We always will be until the end. What we suffer from our spiritual friend said was the human condition. We always will.
That’s why, despite our being honest with ourselves and our Higher Power, we need to learn to back off and stop condemning ourselves. Especially alcoholics like ourselves. I know from my own experience and what I was listening to that we make mistakes. And despite this knowledge we tend to go hard on ourselves and need to learn how to back off.
I know if I keep aiming at working this program everyday and striving for change, that change will come about. I’ve already experienced that and know that I’m not who I was, when I came in. And looking back I can see the changes, which have occurred over time.
We talked about this and practicing compassion toward others, who need it. The Twelfth Step. That and going to meetings and sharing with others and listening to those things we need to be reminded of on a daily basis.
After the call I couldn’t help but think about how blessed I am to be a recipient of this kind of call and talk. It was like I was talking to myself. Like it was me, who called myself. And, yes, we talked about our sobriety and our gratitude for all we have been given. Especially those moments we know so little about. Our spiritual awakenings or experiences. Enough to say thanks.