It’s about the solution and not the problem isn’t it? What good does it do me or anyone else, if we are discussing a problem, but there’s no answer? That can be a guarantee that whatever the result of a meeting on a subject of a problem that we’ll all end up in confusion, depression, and despair.
Someone wanted to talk about anger and a resentment they had. A lot of the people identified with the subject, but few if any talked about an answer, a solution. And yet all anyone had to do was talk about the Steps, which covered this subject. And there we have it. The solution.
First of all, most of us have had many experiences with the problem of anger and the result, a resentment. Of course it’s difficult to give up and surrender, especially, when we are enjoying the resentment. And what kind of pleasure can we derive from resentments? Self pity of course. Isn’t that what they’re really all about? Hard to admit, but there it is.
For us, we’re told, there is no such thing for the alcoholic as justifiable anger. It’s the dubious luxury of normal men. Worse still we are told that resentment and anger cuts us off from the sunlight of the spirit. And there it is. The peril of the next drink. But there is an answer to this and it requires another subject at the meeting today. Humility.
When I use the 10th Step of this program and am willing to admit that I could be wrong, when I am ready to surrender to my Higher Power and ask for help with this, my ego, my pride is put aside. Difficult? Often, yes. Because I have difficulty with letting go of my selfishness and my self centered way of thinking. Hard to let go of the pleasure derived from self pity. Feeling sorry for myself.
I always remember the woman, who wrote Freedom From Bondage, and her experiences with hatred and resentments and the answer she found. It’s in the BB. The solution she spells out for us. But mostly the results of a truly spiritual awakening. What did she get? What did I get? Just what she did. She said she didn’t always get what she wanted, but she always got what she needed. And when she got what she needed, she found that it was what she wanted all along. Amen to that.
And, yes, there’s more to it than that. Like her, I didn’t have to take a drink. That’s the bottom line isn’t it? That with the help of my Higher Power and the people in this program I can stay sober. What a wonderful gift for this alcoholic.